“

i think i was in love with him
long before i ever realised,
before the time he met my mum,
or bought me my first gift,
or even before we first told each other.

he was different than the others,
i know that’s cliche, but it’s true.
i rush a lot of things to attempt to get
the best out of people as quickly
as possible, but with him i took it slow.

we were talking for a month before
our lips ever came close to touching,
yet i don’t think i’ve ever learnt more
about a person, than i did
through our late night online chats.

i remember i invited him over to
a friend’s house once, it was 
the first time we’d hung out
since we’d kissed, intoxicated, 
around a bonfire.
everyone fell asleep around 2am
but we stayed up together,
the menu screen of a DVD playing
over and over again in the background,
just staring into each other’s eyes;
i’ve never gotten so much information
through silence before.

the first time i stayed over
we were awkward and shy,
but after hours of sitting quietly 
and motionless next to each other,
we finally kissed and it was like
fireworks were dancing around my heart.
we stayed up late that night too,
talking until way past 4am,
telling each other things like 
we’d known each other our entire lives.

but all that time i denied
that i was letting my heart be happy
for the first time in a long time,
and i recall one night back at the
start, we were laying on his bed,
he had made me laugh
louder than i had in over two years;
we were lying just inches apart,
I felt butterflies eating at my insides,
and i nearly said i love you, 
but then i caught his eye, and i knew 
that the look in my face, said it all.

”