Let me tell you about a stronger girl more than me.
The moment i saw her, i knew that i want to be friends with her.
She had this unique personality that only few i have encountered with
Ive always love a strong girl, who was actually soft inside, and probably fragile than you think.

I know nothing about her except that we have to work on the same seminar last time. And after that , i got to know her closer, and decided to open up to her about what i was going through. Giving up.

Its probably strange that i would tell her instead of my close friend, but for some reason, i think she would understand that feeling because shes also doing a research. I was already in a vulnerable state that time, and i wrote quite a long email about that , because if i were to tell that infront of her, i would certainly cry.

Holding myself together all the time was exhausting, so i learnt to let go. I learnt to give up. And hold on to others, reaching for a shoulder to cry on. And it was probably the best thing ive ever done.

I was falling, and this friend catched me enough time not to let me spiral back down. But i also know that it wasnt just her who catch me at that time, but Allah swt have sent me a few more people, but she happened to be the closest person to ever found me in that state.

You can know in one look that you want to be friends, good friends or close friends with a person. And i have neve been so fortunate enough to find more than one person. She was one of them.

The longer im doing research, the longer list of people i am thankful for, and would have to put their name in acknowledgement. But to her, i owe her one of the biggest part, because she was struggling too, she was having a hard time on her own personal issue, and yet, she still reach out for another person not to fall down

And thats when i decided to help more people like me, starting from my friends near me, so that at least one more person wont fall down like i almost slipped. One by one, i try my best to reach out to them, making sure they are not hurt, and safe. I know i cant save everyone, but at least i can help someone.

I know that im still struggling myself with this whole research, but i hope that if you are struggling with something, whatever it is, 
you are not alone.